Clean, Fresh & Sex Crazy Sweden

Posted in Uncategorized on June 5, 2011 by lottyinperth

I have arrived in Sweden . First thing that hit me when I walked off the plane to the luggage area was how clean and modern everything is. It feels great to be able to drink well tasting water straight from the tap. Welcome to clean and fresh Sweden.

Then I walked past a news bill for one of Sweden’s biggest and most sensational newspapers, showing the headline “Caught having sex in Church”, containing  very visual photos of a couple getting arrested by police in a CHURCH. Welcome to liberal and sex crazy Sweden.
 
My journey to Sweden started with a flight from Perth to Kuala Lumpur. Like last year when I did the same trip, I was seated beside a man who would instantly bother me. He smelt like a bottle of whisky mixed with an ashtray.  This man was not Asian like the legend from my last trip, but he shared the habit of insisting on talking-to-someone-and-not-accepting-they -cannot-understand-you.
 
The difference was that this man spoke English. Just in a incomprehensible way.
 
I tried my best being polite, decoding his speech and smiling a little. He responded with a stone face and more bullshit. So lucky was I when the cabin staff handed out headphones. Those were covering my ears the rest of the trip, even when they served dinner. “CHICKEN!!!”,  I must have screamed out when the dinner came. Chicken seems to be the standing alternative for all flight meals, hence I chose this safe card not to risk taking my head phones off.
 
Even though the head phones were on, I could feel the pain of the air being cut through like a knife from the cries of a choir of babies. I counted 4 babies around me. They were having a “Who can cry loudest and for longest?”-competition. The champ closest to me won.  I think he cried/screamed 90% of the flight. That’s a true winner!
 
The question people tend to ask you when you get over 25: “Are you ready to have a baby?”should be corrected. 
 
Babies are cute and have soft, raspberry smelling skin.
 
It should be:
“Are you ready for some sleep deprivation?”
 
In the morning, the Champ who deprived me of my sleep, smiled at me. Not a vicious smile. A pure and happy smile. I smiled back (as I’m not a whisky/ashtray stinking stone face). I guess that even if they steal your energy, they have got the talent of giving it back to you.
 
I am so happy to be in Sweden to enjoy the summer. We barbequed salmon at 9pm yesterday and the sun was shining. That puts a big smile on my face.  
 
Here is this weekend’s Top 3 list (based on albums listened to at Malaysian Airlines…):
 
1. Science & Faith, The Script (with lyrics):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2gFlXGdXBc
 
2. Rolling in the Deep, Adele:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rYEDA3JcQqw
 
3. When I’m alone, Lissie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7G0_eN36QVc
 

I’m an Angry Bird over 20

Posted in Uncategorized on May 23, 2011 by lottyinperth

Last week has been full of exams and final assignments at Uni. That makes me feel like this angry bird that I spotted on the brewery Little Creatures.

I feel even more like this bird, when I think about Linda’s departure from Perth last Monday. We spent the Sunday before that at Little Creatures, my favorite spot in Perth. Easy choice as they:

  1. Serve thin chips with crispy skin
  2. Manage to make fantastic aioli that even “I HATE Mayo”-Lotty loves
  3. Their beer will astound even the strictest wine drinker

Linda is one of those great people you meet who leaves a foot print in your life and in your heart.

She is the one that I dug up a pot flower with from Hay Street and then planted it again on Murray Street.  Guess that our contribution in making city of Perth more attractive is moving pot flowers on the shopping streets.

We share an interest of partying in a memorable manner as above and below photos demonstrate.

We are also crap at skipping nightclub lines. One example from an attempt at Tiger Lil’s nightclub.

Lotty (addressing bouncer): We’re under Andrew on the guest list.

Bouncer: Nope. No Andrew on the list.

Linda:  Sorry, she meant Arthur.

Bouncer: Nope, no Arthur either.

Lotty: What I really meant however was Adam. Or John.

Bouncer: Ladies, how about joining the line as everyone else?

Linda I will miss you heaps! Ps Thanks for telling the bouncer at Generous Squire to check my ID (adding “she gets sad if people think that she’s over 20.”)

This week’s song is suitable Alizée with “J’ai Pas Vingt Ans”:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKz-t1wX7kI&feature=related

And here is the Benny Benassi remix of same song (love this remix):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3C-yUs2Qa9s

Bieber Hot & Prince William Sweating like a Dogg

Posted in Uncategorized on April 29, 2011 by lottyinperth

During Easter Break I did a lot of things but eating traditional Easter food or attending church. I did however contemplate why Australians call it Good Friday while Swedes call it Long Friday. Jesus died a long death, - hence Long Friday. But why Good Friday?

Riley’s birthday is occuring during Easter so a lot of focus was on him. I focused on singing Happy Birthday over and over again, to his lack of delight.  

The birthday was celebrated at Brad’s place. Brad had rented a spa. That’s just Brad. Brad said he had spent 16 hours in the spa during Good Friday. Which sounds like a religious statement of forcing pain on yourself. Or just Brad. SEO “Brad”….:)

Later on during the same party, a stunning girl came up to me and briefly stroke my hair. 

Girl: It’s too short.  (Comment followed by a swap-side of her Hollywood mane. You know the Shampoo-commercial style)

Lotty: I can’t have it as long as yours. It’s too thin, it’ll break.  (I have never been good at defending myself)

Girl: Have you heard about hair extensions? It’s great.  (The throw with the hair again)

Lotty: You’re right. I should use hair extensions.  (Or just realise I’m not 21 anymore)

During Easter my niece told me that a movie with Justin Bieber is out on the cinemas. She enlightened me not only of the fact that he is sexy and hot. She also stated that I will define his looks in those terms after watching the movie.

 

Hence I decided not to take the risk of ever seeing that movie. What did make me happy though is the logic it runs out in:

“Justin Bieber is considered sexy and hot.”

“My hair  looks like Justin Bieber’s hair.”

“Hence, my hair style is hot.” Ha, stunning-girl-at-the-party!

Tonight or more accurately today (in London time) Prince William and “Katherine-Kate” are getting married. Therefor I have chosen “Sweat” by Snoop Dogg and David Guetta as this weekend’s song. This song was produced for Prince William:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cTVtvPEKLAU

The outfit of the Easter week was found at Windsor, spotted by me and Sarah. A man well over 40 rocked his (spider)socks off in below outfit:

(Pictures from: cinemovie.tv, albumartexchange.us)

Sensational Singapore

Posted in Uncategorized on April 16, 2011 by lottyinperth

How was my 2 day itinerary in Singapore? Expensive. Exhausting. And totally Exhilarating.

 

Being in Singapore is like being a kid in a candy store. First you get overly excited, then high on the pleasure it brings you, and finally you end up feeling sick of it. After two days you have had it with:

1. Starbucks (“let’s put loads of artificial flavours, sugar and milk in the mugs so that the customers can’t taste the poor quality of the coffee”)

2. Prada staff (“only force a smile on your face for and say hi to the customers spending a minimum of $1000”)

3. Orchard Road – Shopping Overload. As a rushed love affair, you fall in love as quick as you fall out of it.

 

Orchard Road is however the hub for galleries, boutiques and eateries. If you want a tailor made suit, shirt or dress you will find it here. If you are craving for culinary delights you will find it here. If you just need to munge on any of the cup cakes in the Angry Bird series you will find the opportunity to do so here.

The road is dynamic, colorful and eccentric. I found the perfect bag for my laptop at Marc by Marc Jacobs and a pair of shoes to die for at Jimmy Choo. I departed both stores empty handed with a broken heart. I assured my partner that if I was rich, I would for sure look as good as Miranda Kerr or Sienna Miller. I am one design conscious girl, just one lacking the liquidity. Good excuse, hey? ;)

Singapore is like a pot of traditionalism mixed with futurism. Moments occurred when I thought “Wow, this is what the future city will look like.” Cable cars taking us from Singapore to the nearby island Sentosa might be the transport system the future holds in hand. Us driving downhills in mini cars at the same Sentosa island just to get to the beach. Like being in the Back to the Future movie.

 

My picks of the trip:

Shopping: Charles & Keith. Like my friend Rhianna said before the trip “Girlfriend, do yourself the favour and visit Charles & Keith.” As I entered the store, I entered a paradise of shoes and bags. At bargain prices!

Bakery: Designer Bakes. Even if you do not buy the cup cakes, the pure existence of them will fill you with happiness. Super Mario Bro’s and Angry Birds as cup cakes = genius!

Bars: Pricewise it hurts in the wallet, but C Clinic is such a cool bar in Clarke Quay. The bartenders are dressed as doctors and nurses on the duty to make sure all “patients” drink enough. Another bar for the sassy and hip crowd (not sure if we were hip enough though) is Le Noir. When sharing a sheesha (love pronouncing that word!) in the harbor, we noticed a skyhigh bar, which we decided to find our way to. It is called Helipad and is well worth a visit due to the spectacular view.

 

As spectacular, cool and sassy as those bars is this weekend’s song, Last Night with Ian Carey, Snoop Dogg & Bobby Anthony:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mf1mG6iw9fs

Lotty going to Singapore

Posted in Uncategorized on April 7, 2011 by lottyinperth

Not only am I a bad blogger with one of the least updated blogs in the blogosphere.

I am also a bad friend. My best friend and loyal reader of my blog has posted 3 comments the last week. It took me about a week to reply to those.

So here I am, super stressed before our Singapore weekend, ignoring my boyfriend begging me to help him pack – to do 2 things:

1. Post 1 blog post before I go to Singapore. 2. Be a good friend and reply to comments posted on my blog.

I also, to be an even better blogger and friend, promise to put up photos of myself in next blog post. At this stage my hairdo has become a mix of Justin Bieber and something an old lady would choose a a hairstyle. 

Have a great weekend everyone! This weekend’s song is Rumors by Lindsay Lohan (only reason of choice that I had no idea she was also a singer! Multitalented = actress/drug&alcohol addict/singer).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g01J9DW10EQ&feature=related

Boxing, Bieber & Bilar

Posted in Uncategorized on March 25, 2011 by lottyinperth

This week has been a journey in a spinning wheel. I hardly know if I am human being or robot anymore. Not only does it feel as if I have aged this week, other signs are out there to confirm the getting older has taken place:

1. I am not familiar with sleeping in anymore. Waking up after 8am makes me feel guilty.

2. I have said following sentence out loud “I feel that the hours of the day just aren’t enough” one too many times.

Why this negativity? I have been studying for the final exam in the Stockmarket tomorrow. I am not going to bore you; instead I will share the only amusing thing about the share market in Sweden.

Call- (köp) and put- (sälj) options are monthly organized with a letter. Call options will get the letter A-L and put options will get the letter M-X. Each letter has a name: A’s name is Adam. Adam means Call option with the end month of January.  Each name has a nick name. The nick name of the put options’ V and W are: VODKA and WHISKY.

Does this not want you want to attend an old fashioned option auction, slightly intoxicated, and scream out “I want to buy 10 units of VODKA and 500 units of WHISKY!!!” Haha.

What else is new?

Well I have had a haircut. Since I don’t have any photo evidence of this new hairdo I will show a picture of Justin Bieber for you to get the picture of what I look like. So part from spending a week in hell, this sequence of my life has been experienced to the tunes of “Baby, Baby, Baby” by Mr. (or Master?) Bieber performed by my dear partner.  

My younger sister Sanna is boxing with a former Swedish boxing champion: Paolo Roberto. Paolo is the gangster – went good guy – went actor/TV-host – went politician. He’s known for this legendary character journey and the character played in the cult movie Stockholm Night. Sanna has been texting me about this for weeks, never responding to my repeated question “Why?”  

 vs. 

I told her to mumble following movie lines from Stockholm Night where Paulo plays a gangster (himself?) while boxing “Something to bite in…” and “Mind your own business you old hag!”

Lost in translation of the week.

R and I went to IKEA to buy one piece of furniture and lots of candy. The candy cars at IKEA are exclusively worth going all the way out there for. I held one car in front of R, theatrically saying “There is only one way to stop them. [Dramatic pause] In your mouth.” R looked at me with the typical ‘my girlfriend is a lunatic’-look, without even trying to understand what I was saying.  

Minutes after, I started laughing (lunatic manner confirmed). “I mean that the only way you can put them is in your mouth. In Swedish put can be “stoppa”. Like stop you know. Makes sense hey?”

I look like Justin Bieber.  Usher is in Australia. This makes the logical choice of weekend song “Somebody to love” with Justin Bieber and Usher. This You Tube clip has been watched over 143 million times:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOI4OF7iIr4

 (Pictures from: shenzhenparty.com, celebritysmackblog.com, tradera.com, resume.se, stureplan.se, flickr.com)

Lake King – Western Australia’s best kept secret

Posted in Uncategorized on March 15, 2011 by lottyinperth

I am back in Perth after spending 24 hours in Lake King, a town located in Western Australia’s outback.  

Normally I would be able to describe a weekend (or more accurate a day) in a few phrases but now I don’t even know where to begin to do this trip justice. However –  I will do my best.

So there we were 5 girls, early Saturday morning, leaving the “big” city Perth to travel 4 hours to Lake King. Or that’s what we thought. Renee was the only one who had contemplated that a map could be useful. So she had painted a map.

We agreed upon that when going somewhere, the road trip is more than 50% of the fun. And we did have a great road trip singing along to all kinds of songs and thoroughly discussing all important topics in life such as love, sex and foreign policy.

We stopped at the few gas stations we passed to buy somethin (anything) and to act as if we had arrived in another country with a very different culture. Questions such as “How many people live here?”, “Do you have a school?” were asked to the staff in slow, articulate English while we nodded insightfully to their answers. (Replied in quick, perfect English: “Over 1500.” “Of course we have a school.”)

We found a peculiar sign (see below) accusing a fox for the crime of murdering and slaughtering amongst other really bad things!!! The choice of words and three exclamation marks made us speechless so we decided to document it.

 

 Well in Lake King 7 hours after starting point a sign welcomed us with the slogan “Lake King – Western Australia’s best kept secret”.  This together with the fact that no one had phone reception led ones thought to all those horror movies of young people going out on road trips, happy unknowingly what is ahead of them. Why is Lake King kept a secret?

We went into the pub which is located by a gas station (=this constitutes the secret town) to make a phone call to Åsa whose phone was off. Since they all know each other in this town the bartender could give us a precise road description to Åsa’s house. “5-10 k’s after the red lights (my note: the first ones for 3 hours) and then right where the fences are white.”

When we came to the house it was deserted. 2 dogs in a cage barking, flies attacking us and a huge spider lurking in his net by the fence. Sanna warned me that those hairy spiders jump towards your face if they feel threatened. My gut feeling got worse when we got to their door step and I almost whispered:

“Something is wrong guys. Those are kids’ shoes. I don’t know what is going on.” The horror movie scenario got stronger.

Then a car rolled up the drive way, and through the dusty air out of the car jumped Little Åsa, all happy and shiny.  How could I have forgotten that she has the tiniest feet in the world? 

See photo above for “Big” Åsa praying on the ground.

Happiness! The barking dogs got released from their cage and it came to our understanding that they are in fact sheep dogs. Michael told us to jump on the trunk of his car to go and see some of their 3000 sheep.  So there we sat, 6 girls on the trunk, sipping beer in the sunshine with beautiful sheep dogs. Dusty air flying around us on this bumpy road trip, still all of us laughing and having fun.

Horror movie turned beer commercial.

After downing a whole bottle of Zubrowka, probably the best vodka in the world, we went out for dinner at the one place you can go out to: the Pub.

The pub is the center of Lake King.  There’s just no other options in this case – so the pub is da place to be. Below a photo of Renee and the Jukebox, which our girl group was ruling in a dictatorship manner.

We spent a night living like men. You would find us either in the bar ordering booze or playing games. Not love games. Fussball, pool and dart. The whole night.  The pub closed in the middle of my last dart game which by then was getting fiercely.

We headed to Åsa’s house after the game/party night, and she announced she had told someone she was having an after party. After 5 minutes one car rolled up by her house. Then 2, 3, 4, 5, SIX cars full of people. Literally the whole town, who had been on the pub, showed up to the after party.

It was one of those wild after party’s where:

1.Someone in my group gets so into Wee tennis so she swings two wine glasses in the wall in her tennis swing.

2. Someone in my group tricks a thirsty girl in the town that it is water in my plastic bottle of vodka.

 3. I consider to chase one guy, who is highly annoying, out of the house with a fire stick.

4. The guys in the town puts toilet paper on fire in the garden.

It was a wild night in Lake King: Western Australia’s best kept secret.

On the way back no one longer agreed to the fun-ness of a road trip. We were a bunch of hung over girls, feeling like ship wrecks with a minimum of 6 hours road trip in front of us. The girl talk was swapped to silence and the music was swapped to pod casts on the subject of tragic real life stories. 

But those 24 hours in Lake King will never be forgotten.  

Above picture: Lotty chasing sheep.

Little Åsa: please write a book about your life. PLEASE. I put my order in now for a signed version of it.  

(Pictures from:  australianexplorer.com and my camera)

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